Have you ever tried to correct someone, or ask someone to do something, and get these types of reply?
"Don't tell me what to do."
"Mind your own business."
"You think you are right, you are making the same mistake also."
"I didn't make the mistake you did, what I did was not a mistake, it's different from yours".
"You think you know everything, think you are good enough to teach me."
Do these sound familiar? Do you feel frustrated? Do you know why people are saying these?
The reason is plain simple, we always ask someone to correct a mistake we always make. We will have dozen of excuses to defend our mistakes. We tell people not to lie but we lie always, we tell people to take responsibility but we don't always, we tell people to keep promises but we deny always, we tell people to control their temper with bad temper always. We always contradict ourselves in behavior and words, then how can we expect others to listen.
Do you know who teaches us to lie, to run away from responsibility, and to get mad? They are our parents. Don't be shocked by this, go back to your childhood memory, how many times had we told ourselves not to listen to them anymore, after they failed a promise, or denied a mistake. Did you hate to see your parents fighting, yelling at each other, and unconsciously followed their emotion, attitude, and manner of speaking and nasty talk. This is the reason why a lot of the children have similar bad temper just like one or both of their parents.
A lot of parents never say sorry, they think apology will make them lose faces and dignity, and the children would never listen to them again. In order to keep their dignity, they will deny any mistake, even scare the children by not buying them toys or taking them to parks. Will the children think they keep their dignity for denying mistakes, and listen to them more and more? Of course not, we all hate parents denying mistakes, they are not only losing our respect and obedience, and most importantly, they are losing our love and trust. This is also the main cause of our rebellious nature.
Dignity and keeping face will develop stubbornness. We are stubborn to our ideas, hobbies and preferences when others are criticizing, we think admitting criticism will make us lose dignity, face and respect. Therefore, we will fight for any criticism even if it is right and in favor of our personality, life or future.
A lot of parents also demonstrate to their children how to use violence by beating or throwing stuff to each other. One side will then teach his or her children how to hate and alienate their father or mother. And finally they are teaching their children the easiest way to solve marriage problems, by divorcing, running away, or committing suicide or homicide.
Generally speaking, kids being raised in wealthy families will have better chances to receive material life, education, care, enjoyment and entertainment, they will have more chances to travel, to experience different cultures and life styles, and less chances to face violence, crime and drugs. They will receive more admiration, flattery, support and help from people around, and learn to respond automatically with modesty and respect.
Kids being raised in poor families will have less material life, care, and enjoyment; they will have higher chances to face drugs, violence, discrimination and bad language. They have strong desire to live in big house, drive luxurious sport cars, have adequate money to spend, and travel oversea. They are full of anger, annoyance, unsatisfactory, jealousy, rebellion and hate. Their parents didn't taught them the importance of content and taking criticism, instead, they are intentionally or unintentionally teaching them to hate, to revenge, to fight for their living, and to make big fast money with any possible method.
Therefore, they will join the gangs, to sell drugs, to sell their bodies, to commit crimes, to sell their spirits to devils, and to send their future and destiny to hell. But there are always exceptional in both cases, there are always black sheep in a healthy family, and white sheep in an unhealthy family.
Some of the unlucky children may have stress build up, mental disorder, inclination of committing crime or suicide and even become a complex killer. Most of the teenage that have committed serious crime in stealing, battery or robbing all have certain degree of problems in their families.
This is all humanity, passing generation after generation to our youth, friends and love one, affecting so many lives, changing so many destinies and destroying so much pleasant future. Therefore nobody listens, everyone repeats the same sort of argument again and again, fights for something nobody will win, hurting each other harder and harder, deeper and deeper each time.
Can we get away from this tight corner? Is there any way out?